Even When it Seems Like We’re in Control

What happens when we become aware of our need to exert greater control? For one, we become more conscious of what we are doing at any given moment. We may even try to pry ourselves away from negative control if the situation allows for it. But what happens when our actions fool our minds into believing we are acting with positive control? The answer, in short, is that we waste valuable time.

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The Types of Control

You’ve done it, congratulations! You’ve found your anger and you want to retake control in your life. You may, however, be wondering what that might mean. Let’s review a couple concepts from Sunday’s post and introduce a few more.

Positive Control

Positive control is control you are exerting on your surroundings. Positive control flows from you when you are consciously performing actions towards a specific end goal of your choice. Positive control is what we’re aiming for.

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Find Your Need for Control

The concept of control is one that has fascinated me for most of my life, even when I haven’t been expressly aware of it. I have drifted into jobs where there was a sense of control, such as heading up a quality control lab. I even gravitated towards activities that promised to enhance my sense of control, such as dancing and martial arts. But what is it about control that keeps me unconsciously looking for it?

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Taking Back Control of My Life

One of the things I’ve noticed about myself is my ability to slip into lapses of control where I’m only vaguely aware that I’m no longer in control of what I’m doing. Perhaps a book, or internet site has captured my attention and is dragging me along for a ride. Perhaps I’ve gotten sucked into a video game and have lost track of an entire weekend. It is frustrating to me on the one hand and fascinating on the other. How can we get so involved with something that we let go of the one thing that can push us to excel? How do we get so involved that we lose control? We’ve all disappeared down the rabbit hole of Wikipedia before. There have been times in my life when I knew more control needed to be exerted. Here are some of my stories.

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The Question of Control

I sit here and wonder about control. How do I control the words that flow from my mind to the tips of my fingers. There are times when I can sit here for countless hours and fill my mind with the nonsensical entertainment of the internet. All the while I know that I need to get work done. I need to get words out of my head and onto an electronic page that ultimately only exists as a series of codes. All of this, from the words flowing from my brain to the act of pulling myself away from kitten videos on YouTube and 9GAG takes a control. Therein lays my question. What is control, really? Is it the ability to turn away, or is it the ability to keep looking? Where does control come from? Is it our willpower, or another as yet undiscovered aspect of our personalities? And perhaps most importantly, how do I determine where the control is coming from, and in which direction is it flowing?

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